[10.20] III - Designing a Nervous Breakdown
Another night, another dream, but always you, it's like a visio...
Yeah so I started typing "another" like I was gonna say something stupid about how this is another week and this is another column but somehow the Real McCoy worked its way in there and it rapidly became a nasty situation for everyone. I'm sorry, I really am. Okay, I'm not but still.
I was pleasantly surprised by the letters I got this week. Honestly, I wasn't expecting much more than a few swear-word littered flame mails for losing letters, or maybe an expulsion of gaseous odor in my general direction, but left carrot suckup right carrot N-Sider has the greatest damned readers in the world who greatly appreciate our content and make my life worth living every single day cause I wake up and think "damn, I don't want to go to class or cleanse my body or do my homewo OH WAIT! the N-Sider readers love us" and it makes everything worthwhile left carrot backslash suckup right carrot.
So this week, we've got some good responses to the (admittedly a little over-discussed by now) topic that I threw out last time, as well as a light-hearted letter AND INTENSELY THOUGHT-PROVOKING one at that which I'll probably use as a topic for next time. But who am I to discuss my innermost column secrets with all y'all? Oh right the author.
Just scroll down and read the freaking letters instead of perusing my introductory tripe next time, alright?
| Because We Need More Shortages |
Here's my thoughts:
Nintendo, should, for the first week of the 'N5''s launch, have it priced $50 less (or maybe even more of a reduction) than it's regular price. (Example: it was $300, during launch week, it's only $250)
If they advertise it well, ("For a very limited time only the 'N5' is just $250) and have a swell launch line up to choose from, they can sell out.
Since Nintendo isn't the type to produce multifunctional machines, the 'N5' should be compatible with the GCN, and even the GB player.
As for memory cards, they should be at least a GB in size.
And Wireless controllers with rechargable batteries, like GBA SP's are also an excellent idea for the N5.
PsychoWiLL -
| I'd Buy That For 50$ Less |
When I first read the letter, I thought that the idea of pricing the system even lower than "retail" at launch would be an idiotic move on Nintendo's part (yeah, we've got people lining up to get systems there aren't enough of anyway -- let's lower the price) but the more I think about it, the more intelligent it seems. Sure, Nintendo stands to make an assload of money at launch, and could charge essentially what they want, but if they announce the retail price and kick it down fifty bucks, more people will line up to get them on launch day instead of waiting for more games to come out. This gives them a sold software advantage, as well as allows them to nab the pseudo impulse buyer right from the outset. I guess there could be problems if people didn't know the intended retail ahead of time and saw the price get jacked up later, but maybe there could just be a widespread coupon deal or something. Who knows. Interesting theory though.
Crossplatform GC functionality I'm highly doubting, especially considering the relatively small install base of the Cube, but offering the ability to use the Cube GB player or having some sort of interoperability between the GBA and the Cube would be a good idea from the outset, I think.
I'm gonna have to say that the concept of a memory card with a GIG of storage seems a tad overkill, but I think Nintendo's idea to get that 251 out onto the market to replace the way-too-small 59 was a good idea. It shot them in the foot with ailing sports sales early on, so it's important to have that from the outset. Hell, why not a hard drive? I hear it's all the rage nowadays.
Finally in regards to the wireless situation, I think I'm with the entirety of the gaming community when I say that wireless rechargeable controllers should be default on ALL the next-gen systems.
| SlowZ - RHOH |
The subject you brought up has been on my mind for a small while now and I would like to run some speculation by you on this subject. The Gamecube is suddenly selling. The Gameboy Advance SP has also sold well. What do these two systems have in common? That's right they're both 100 bucks. If Nintendo only wants a game only system then perhaps people won't take it seriously unless it starts dirt cheap. Powerfull, profitable AND 100 bucks should be their goal if thats at all possible. Otherwise people may still see it as only a system not as worthwhile as the competition if they had to pick and choose. Otherwise they have to get it out on time and grab that gotta get hype away from the competition if they can't price it really low. A games only machine means that in the end it has to be cheap compared to the rest and I'd rather nintendo made it 100 bucks than to be forced into that price range like this time.
Michael Moore
| Zoom, Speed, Hold Punch |
This one suggests a full on RETAIL of a hundred bucks from the start. I'd be quite impressed if Nintendo could put a new machine to market for one hundred dollars, but I bet it would really force the gaming industry to make some price changes. If they do go with a games-only machine (which this columnist is betting on), it might be easier to price the machine cheaper at launch than it would if it had DVD CD MP3 BBQ capabilities. Forgive all the BBQing but I need to BBQ.
Of special note to Heart Containers readers might be the fact that this letter is from Michael Moore, director of not-really-a-documentary Bowling for Columbine. Actually it's probably a different person named Michael Moore, but I'm going to pretend big pompous uninformed asshole celebrities like Nintendo too.
| I Gots Da Funky Flow |
So whats gunna happen in the next generation of consule wars? It's really impossible to tell....but hey, we can all predict right? Anywaz, to stay competitive, Nintedo has to make sure that they launch close to their competitors. yeah, this seems like a given, but the trick is to make sure they don't launch to far before, or too far after. Think about what happend with the Dreamcast. A great system, everyone enjoyed it for a year, but it lost its base of support as soon as the PS2 came out. By launching say, a month before the competition, Nintendo can ensure that they're new system will still have momentum once the competition launches. This brings up 2 more problems: Hype and Launch titles
Hype is something Nintendo really isn't good at. Unfortunately, people (ie the general public) buy systems based more on what there friends tell them then what the system is actually like (specs, controller etc....)The PS2, again, is a prime example. The system was hyped beyond belief. Even today, many people swear that it is the most powerful system available (again, refering to the general public). All this based on word of mouth and hype. Nintendo needs to show the people what they want. Play to the crowd. Show them the meaningless tech demos. Show them the stats. People don't know the difference between rendering untextured, unlighted polygons and actual gameplay performance. They don't care. Bigger numbers equal bigger performance. And Nintendo needs to start soon. This upcoming E3, we'll prolly be getting specs from most of the major players. This is where Nintendo needs to shine.
Launch titles could very well control the first 6 months of the next generation of counsoles. The PS3 will have all the hype coming off the PS2, so they can afford to have a sub par launch. However, if Microsoft and Nintendo want to remain competitive, they need to have stellar, system-pushing launch titles. This is where Nintendo is capable of making up the most ground. Imagine a launch of the N5 with a bran spanking new Zelda game. Bundle it with the system. Advertise it. Nintendo isn't afraid to use its frachises, and its great that they spread them out over the life span of the system. But make sure that the top quality, recognizable games are there at launch. Even some great third part games. Imagine launching with a brand new Resident Evil. It's a name people know and trust, and one that going to move systems.
Jon
| M-I-X the Flourinta the Bowl |
I'm in pretty much total agreement with most of this letter. Launching just a little before the competitors would be a great idea, far enough ahead that the Box2 and PS3 hype hadn't gotten TOO far out of control, but late enough that they'd still be in on that generation of systems. Dreamcast showed us that an early launch will push systems, but people are always looking for The Next Big Thing.
The Nintendo franchise characters are being used pretty well at this stage of the game, but at launch they were nowhere, and it's certain that they need to do something about that. Advertise, promote, give us free pizza and live in harmony with the Earth. Nintendo's gameplan for the N5. No really, I stole it from Miyamoto. No, really. You just wait till you're eating the pizza before you apologize, how about.
| Can't Win 32.2348% of Them |
Hi Brandon
What!? you lost my mail about generic soda, bah!
Regards,
Daniel Holland
ps. One day I will write something for this colum, but not now!
| Can't Lose 68.7652% of Them |
This lovely fellow sent me a letter for the first letter-based Heart Containers about what was my favorite type of generic soda. But I lost it.
In response to your previous question, I'm very partial to RC Cola, if'n that's considered generic. If it's not though, then for my money, Heee Haw (a Mello-Yello / Mountain Dew ripoff) is the best freakin' carbonated beverage my twenty-five cents a can is able to buy.
| First Two Sentences Notwithstanding |
You are no jackass, brandon. Your a cool guy. I mean that. I really do.
Right, well, changing the subject a little from your 'future of Nintendo consoles' thing (even though your toast idea sounds pretty sweet), wouldn't it be cool to have Viewtiful powers? Like slowing down time and, uh, zooming in and stuff like that? I mean, durring class I would use mach speed to make the time go by faster, and as a outside linebacker for my high school, slow-mo would really come in handy.
The only that would suck about these Joe-like powers is that pesky meter that runs out while I use them. Suddenly turning back into, uh, the old me would get annoying--just as it does in the game.
So what about you, Brandon? How would you take advantage of these? You might use mach speed to read through these e-mails faster, or come up with witty one-liners quicker. Tell me what you think.
-Viewtiful Davis
| I'd Have Printed it Anyway |
First of all I'd like to say that this is a very interesting slash fun topic and it's gonna be the one I use for next week. Celebrate, Viewtiful Davis, for you are indeed celebritorious.
Viewtiful powers, eh? Pardon me while I rub my chin.
I am rubbing my chin.
Okay, I think I've got it. If I could have some Viewtiful powers, I'd use the zoom to focus in really closely on poor punctuation since I'm a silly English major (don't remember this, cause if you know I'm an English major you might actually expect something out of the column, and we wouldn't want that) with a penchant for pointing out poor punctuation. I'd use my slow motion to slow the time between classes so I could play Viewtiful Joe more, and then I'd use slow motion in that game while the whole world was slowed down for nearly infinite VFX powers. I'd use the rapid while playing Dance Dance Revolution so I could move my feet EVEN FASTER THAN WHAT I PREVIOUSLY THOUGHT WAS THE PINNACLE OF HUMAN SPEED to dazzle the competition with my glorious moves.
Also I'd use them to get money somehow, maybe by stealing from people. And then I'd light their houses on fire with my Red Hot One Hundred. Also I'd light them on fire too.
--- Closing Comments --- And that's your topic for next week. Viewtiful powers. Would you use them, like me, for personal gains in the areas of money and dancing? Or would you put them to use in PG-13 situations when the action's just begging for a little slow motion and zoom?
I know what you're thinking, but I want you to tell me anyway. All the readers who are TOO SHY TO WRITE IN want you to as well. I apologize for the liberal use of excessive capitalization in this week's column. Or something.
Send me letters with the link down there! brandon at n-sider.com! Do it for rather good justice!
| Got a letter? Send it to Brandon! |