I got your Samus Aran right here

As if the Rule 34 crowd needed ammo, Nintendo saw fit to sully the dignity of Samus Aran by afflicting her with the cat suit Zero Suit in Metroid: Zero Mission. Then our own Brandon has to go and show off his very own just-released fetish idol from Other M. To try and counter the wretched atrocity that is the Zero Suit, I offer up my own Samus figurine for viewing. Think of it as a way to cleanse the palate.

 


This statuette is from First4Figures, and is based on the Metroid Prime iteration of the Varia Suit. Cast of poly-stone and finished with metallic paint, it's actually pretty heavy. I've had it for a few years, and it adorns a place of prominence atop my dresser.

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This is Samus' most iconic look and is what will always come to mind first when I think of the character; not that stretched out toothpick in the blue painted-on body suit, devoid of any muscle tone because it's not like Samus is athletic or anything.

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I've always loved the look of the Varia Suit with its unusual proportions and color scheme. Even in silhouette, you'll never mistake Samus for some generic space marine. The Light Suit from Metroid Prime 2: Echoes comes in at a very close second. Finally, I swear, I just can't do a photo-shoot around here without the rubberneckers gawking at me.

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